Sunday Thoughts: Miss

Last night I put the last of the sippy cups into the recycle bin. It’s the end of an era. 

This morning I pulled it back out for a quick photo. I still remember standing in the store isle to buy this very cup. Max was just exiting the baby phase of bottles and nursing, and I was overwhelmed that there really were that many sippy cups to choose from. He was so wiggly and hated being contained in any way at the store. I remember needing to choose quickly so we could leave before melt down time. I remember feeling the internal heat of stress as a young mom, walking a road that felt so unknown. This one was fairly simple, within our price point, and was sold as a two pack. I'd say four kids and over a decade later, it served it's purpose well.

So grateful we were able to experience this chapter and season of life. Looking at this cup, I miss it. 

The babies in the high chairs picking up and throwing the cup down on the ground. Filled with wonder and curiosity. Me, bending over and picking it up for them. Again. And again. The wobbly toddler who's head is so heavy, when they tip back to take a drink, they fall over. The toddler coming into the kitchen to pull on my leg and say "dwink!" or "donkey milk!" (long story, but that was a nickname for chocolate milk). The little ones cuddled on my lap as I read them a story and they drank milk or water to settle down. The little bite marks from teeth coming in. The water in their cups in their crib at bedtime. Finding a two-day old sippy cup filled with milk in the basement. Ha, okay, that one I won't miss (and that cup was thrown away!). 

It's beautiful to think of all the memories connected to such a simple object. But the joy of those moments wasn't in the cup. It was in the experience. And for that, I'm okay letting the cup go. I'm okay creating space in our cupboards for the here and now.

Because the more I think about something I "miss" the more I realize that it doesn't mean that moment must still exist in the now. Nor does it mean regret.

Instead, to "miss" means that there was something within that moment that was loved and embraced. Something that wired a memory into our minds.

And as I sit in a kitchen, typing this up, I find myself energized and empowered to continue creating space more moments that will someday be "missed." Not to simply "get through" this chapter of motherhood, but to grow and learn within it. To stretch myself beyond comfortable and really become who God hopes for me to be. 

And as this journey continues to unfold, I see these moments like strings of beads on a never-ending strand. Beads of moments that will someday be "missed" and not lost in the routines, schedules or to-do lists. 

But to create moments that seek "to do good continually..." that "inviteth and enticeth to do good, and to love God, and to serve him, is inspired of God." (Moroni 7:13)  

Those are the moments I hope to someday "miss."