Choose to Trust

To my future self, or our children, or our grandchildren who will at some point in life experience change through moving:

I get it.

When I hear the word "move" and think of the changes surrounding it, my initial reaction is a throat-closing-off-heart-pounding-out-of-my-chest sensation. Even after moving to four different states in an eight year time period. Or wait. Maybe it's because of the four moves to four states in eight years those feelings come to mind.

While the reasons for moves are as different as the brush strokes on a canvas, remember the purpose of your path. Keep your perspective broad and remember we are here on earth to learn and grow. If the opportunity has arrived for you to learn and grow through moving, embrace it. Hold tight to it.

Choose to trust.

You might be moving five minutes from where you currently live. You may be moving to a place you've never been to, where you don't know anyone and where you can't even figure out which way is North.

Choose to trust. North is always constant. You'll find it again.

And remember, there is good everywhere if you choose to find it. If you choose to discover it. If you choose to proactively allow yourself to embrace it.

You might feel worried or guilty or fearful that changing through moving will bring added stress/worry/discomfort to your children. It probably will. Maybe they will feel anxious or depressed. They might lose confidence in themselves. But this is nothing to feel guilty, worried or fearful about. Trust the process. Let them wobble in unsure ground and give them space to dig deeper into their roots. To learn their true identity isn't made by friends or accomplishments but in knowing that God, their Father, loves them - no matter what, and has not forgotten them. Let them soak in the satisfaction of truly understanding resilience. Of working through the struggle while climbing the mountain. Let them climb.

You might have moments where you question why. Or you look back and remember how comfortable life was. You may even run scenarios of trying to rewind or undo the change. Give yourself permission to have a bad day, to talk out those thoughts, and to validate yourself back into truth. Back into your purpose. Back into trust. Sometimes you'll be able to do this on your own. And sometimes you'll need the help of someone who can lift you where you stand. It may be a spouse, a parent, a friend who has moved and understands the journey. It may be a professional - a person trained with the tools to help reframe mental thoughts back into truth. Trust that while the past has brought you to where you are today, it is who you become with the present that matters most.

The moving process will probably give you an opportunity for a clean slate and a fresh start. Take advantage. It may mean letting go of things/items that can serve a purpose with others before you leave. Be prayerful and the Lord will guide you. Remember that no matter the current home, or goods you own, they will never bring you the joy and satisfaction that comes from learning and growing through trust in God.

In your new area, you may feel lonely at times. You may yearn for old connections and friendships. There are so many tools out there to keep you connected - use them to fuel you, but don't rely on them. No technology will replace the growth that will come from face to face connections you will make with those that surround you. Give that loneliness to God. Because while you may feel lonely, you are never alone. Pray for ways to be proactive and ideas to get to know those around you. Then go and do them. Stepping out of your comfort zone may be a big challenge for you, but it will probably become one of the most rewarding. Trust those ideas of connection as they come to you.

You may be starting new job or supporting a spouse or parent who is starting a new job. It may be hard. There may be unforeseen challenges. There may also be unforeseen opportunities. Encourage them. Lift them. You will always be stronger together. And remember, you're on the same team.

You may need to let go of things that no longer serve you, and moving may instigate this change. Let go of the resistance and trying to hold onto old ways, and become curious. It may begin a learning journey for new routines in every day life that you may have never considered had you stayed comfortable. Allow yourself to be molded into who He desires you to be.

You may need to let go. Of work. Of volunteer commitments. Of a whole list of things you once identified yourself with. And that's okay. Remember that all of those things had purpose in the present, and it's okay to give yourself permission to embrace new chapters. As you lean into the new, unseen opportunities and understanding about your true identity as a Child of God will become more clear.

Remember the small and simple tools of connection with God. Pray, study the scriptures and obey His words to the best of your ability. Begin a daily habit of the small and simple if you have not yet. It will be a strength to you, it will open the path for you to know His will for you more directly, and it will remind you that through His strength, we can do all things.

One day, you'll walk around your house, and it will feel like home. It most likely won't happen until you've put your heart into the place - cleaning, organizing, unpacking and hanging things with meaning on your walls - but it will happen. The day will come that you unconsciously turn on a light switch - one that you couldn't find on the wall initially. You'll no longer run into doors or walls during the middle of the night. You'll hear a sound and know exactly where it's coming from. But beyond any of the things you place in the house, the feelings of "home" will come from the memories you choose to create within its walls. Be consistent with those simple moments that will bring connection and peace to you.

You may experience a burning desire to explore. In ways you never felt before. Trust those feelings and to the best of your ability - with your commitments, time and finances, explore. It could be as simple as a Saturday afternoon adventure, or an overnight camping experience. It may mean a mini-vacation. As you explore, you may find a burning desire to learn the cultures and traditions of where you live. Take the time to learn them. The more you learn about where you are, the more you'll see the beauty in those who surround you. It may increase your desire to learn more about who you are. Study that. Embrace it.

One day you'll be driving in what was a new area, and will realize that you are able to navigate your way without the help of any digital assistance. Soak in this achievement. Celebrate it. Congratulate yourself on every destination you are able to reach with confidence.

Sometimes, you may look up to the sky and see clouds. The weather patterns and skyline may feel unfamiliar to you. Take time to learn these new patterns. And remember that no matter the clouds, the sun is always shining. It is always constant.

Grow the good. In your home. In your heart. In those you come in contact with each and every day.

Look up as you are in every day life. Look out to those who you can be mindful of and serve in small and simple ways.

Be patient with yourself. Do the things that fill you up. Maybe that's connecting with nature, going for walks and talking, exercising, deepening your meditation, prayer and scripture studying, developing a new hobby, or sitting down on the floor and playing with young children.

And above all, cultivate gratitude. Begin each and every day with a prayer of gratitude for the journey as it is unfolding. And end each day focusing on the specific ways God has been mindful of you.

Because he is.

His love for you is abundant.

Simply choose to trust.

Utah - Part 5

Hiking Bell's Canyon Reservoir! We left super early on a Saturday morning - to take advantage of getting on the trail before it was too crowded. So glad we did! It was shaded, cooler, and the crazy crowds were headed up as we were headed down! Love the energy and love the kids have when heading to the mountains. And lollipops and fruit snacks are great bribes!

Abigail LOVED the Russian Dolls at my parents home. So fun to see her sit and open and close them over and over.

Made it to a movie!

Downtown adventures!

Loved the images of Christ in the Church History Museum!

Love creating intentional time to head to the temple. Even walking along the grounds is so centering and grounding.

At this point of our trip, the kiddos were super sleep deprived, and Max had picked up some kind of a bug. We took him to an urgent care, to find he was actually sick - amazing how antibiotics really can help when they need to. And I feel like it's not a real vacation if we haven't visited an urgent care. But, even not feeling that great, he was determined to get in one more mountain hike our last week there. And while we'd initially planned for something longer, we opted for a short and simple hike - Rocky Mouth Falls. And it really is still a favorite with kids!

Lunch at potbelly! Gosh, I love those spicy sandwiches!

The kiddos had a blast with their cousins doing an acro-yoga class. I wanted to jump right in there with them!

The kiddos helped my dad pick chokecherries - a huge batch that my parents turned into jam. So fun that they were able to try it at Christmastime!

My mom and I found these awesome paintings done ages ago. And the crazy thing is - so many of these were done in FLORIDA!! To think of relatives who were down in Florida so many years ago simply blows my mind, and at the same time makes me so grateful!

We went with my parents and brother to the Rodeo. What a blast!!

And our flight home. I was super stressed about flying home solo with the kiddos on a red eye (and returning the rental car, and all those logistics of luggage and keeping track of this independent soul). Gratefully, my dad willingly offered to ride along with us, help get us into the airport and have the extra set of eyes on this gal. So grateful for their support, their loving ways they serve our family, and how they are always seeing things and situations with such wisdom.

We made it! That yawn turned into sleep for that gal - something I was pleasantly surprised by! Alexis and I had the hardest time sleeping on the plane. The next day we were all so tired! Came home and literally crashed!!

So grateful for the abundant memories and experiences we were able to have!

Sugar Cubes and Family

After reading from The Friend magazine, Alexis was inspired to make a sugar cube temple. We had so much fun building and creating a mini Salt Lake Temple! As we built, we shared something we love about our family and specific things we are grateful about our ancestors. It was simple, and the combination of sugar cubes and frosting left them all on a bit of sugar high, so we were glad for the space in the backyard to run off some of the extra energy! It was on display for a short time at home, until the mini-ants caught wind that sugar was around. So I put out ant traps (ones with this gel - I’ve never used them prior to living here), and the traps kept disappearing. I couldn’t figure it out until one day I saw Abby - picking up a trap and throwing it away! As she threw it she said “oh these things!” I think in her mind, those traps were causing the ants! So funny. After a good laugh, she and I got it straightened out.

But back to the project - it was a fun activity together, and one of those things that all ages jumped in and embraced. I feel like it could become an annual tradition. Love that.